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User blog:NIGHTHAWK33/sparkkit's hope
Sparkkit had her aquamarine hues stretched wide as Brookfall spilled her obstacles out filterlessly, her hypnotic optics betraying more emotion than her words portrayed. She did not expect this at all. The wanted reaction was Brookfall's baffled face, a jealous query, and some sort of lighthearted apology. But wait - you wanted this to be serious.''Then why did she feel more caught off guard than a mouse by what her mother told her? She had always expected to crack Brookfall's shell eventually - ego and all, but not to the point of making the silver medicine cat have a public breakdown and dishing out an even easier apology. Judging from how Brookfall treated fellow felines, it usually required longer than that... Did her Clanmates see? The she-kit's jumbled thoughts persisted suddenly. Sparkkit's ears flared back and forth as she stole stoical glances over her surroundings, but every cat seemed to be lost in their own conversation. Sparkkit, who had been standing rigid as a mountain, finally exhaled a restraint breath, her rubbery lips pressing in a hard line. She hated how Brookfall put her in a situation where her fur had spiked up, her heart was pounding, and her blood became poision that ran warmly down her veins. She really wasn't sure wether she was supposed to follow or not, but before she could determine that, her rather quick reflexes forced her after the silver she-cat faster than her brain did. "W-wait up!" She stuttered, trying to put on her emotionless, cool-kit mask. "It's just... You're not... Hey, I can't catch up!" She squeaked suddenly, falling chin-first onto the ground and racking up peaty soil onto her face. But before she could even figure out what was going on, her optics had gathered salty tears, and they soon shed down her face as she fereciously yowled, "''mama!" not caring wether her demeanor wasn't the one she'd been planning to use this whole time. Her oversensitivity was always a lethal weapon that eroded her intentions like air to rock. Her singular white ear flickered back and forth as Sparkkit's pleads sounded behind her. However due to the shecat's severed state, she didn't process it as anything but mere whispers in the wind. Her shell had cracked. More of Starclan's locks had been strung around her cell. Moons and moons of sheer hatred coming from her own sun and stars, her daughter, had caused her to reach her breaking point. Moons and moons of torment from her so called warrior ancestors had caused her to reach her breaking point. The black or white decisions she had to make on a daily basis made her reach her breaking point. Finally the day had come, today, when there was nothing left inside of her to break. As she trudged further into the winding gorse, the evening causing shadows to play across her lithe frame, Brookfall's frigidly blank expression didn't cease to cast an eerie aura throughout the territory. Sometimes it all got a little too much... Only when a godforsaken mewl had been thrown into the dry air did she pause in her tracks, lifting a vibrant white paw closer to her chest as she simply stared ahead, ears quivering as the word she needed to hear most echoed throughout the tangle of gorse. The silver she held this pose until the shadows being casted from the tall pines above reminded her where she was, who she was. Optics narrowing with conviction, the medicine cat snapped her gaze back around her shoulder, only to find a kitten buried in the arid soil of greenleaf. After a long moments silence, Brookfall parted her jaws to speak, revealing glistening fangs that were once used to beam, to smile, to joke around. Instead, as if all soul had been lost, the molly droned with a mask of paper white, "Put some goldenrod on bleeding scratches." Her monotone, her blank expression; it all seemed to compliment the eerie nothingness that surrounded her empty shell. Everything seemed hazy before Sparkkit, who had her watery hues squinted for Mama's silvery pelt - for the soft smile she spontaneously longed for, for the comforting purrs that never abandoned her tufted triangulars. But what drifted back into earshot was the iciest touch not even a snowstorm's eddies could bring. Gone was the greenleaf foliage surrounding her now, the mrrow''s of laugher from her Clanmates, the sudden feeling of being wanted. Mama - no, ''Brookfall had pushed herself back to the other spectrum once again, further damaging Sparkkit's trust. And even when the sun's radiant, warm scorch beat down on her flame-colored fur - even when she was portrayed as a tiny spark blossoming into a flame, the scenery she was picturing before her displayed the frailest ice that separated her from her mother. She had her tip-toes pushed against the liquid-like ground, fur ruffled up with terror, while Brookfall stood and watched. A swipe of the chilly wind blew against Brookfall at last, forcing her illusion away piece by piece. And even when Sparkkit eventually snapped back to reality, a reality she found imaginary in itself, she knew she would never forget what she just pictured. Cold realization of the fact that she and Brookfall would never have the mother - daughter relationship she used to long for struck her like the arid breeze that whooshed in from the thorn tunnel and conveniently ruffled her pelt, the only non-muted sound next to Brookfall's echoing words and her embarrassed, denying thoughts to rejection. She could practically feel her gaze turning into two chips of the coldest leaf-bare as she slowly eased herself to her haunches, letting the last of tears fall down her cheeks emotionlessly so her surroundings could morph into place - and an utterly different version of Brookfall, the individual whom she identified as the ThunderClan medicine cat and nothing more. "I'm not your medicine cat apprentice," she informed her with a faraway politeness that hid her aching anger. "And I don't want you to tell me what to do. You're a great medicine cat and all, but... I'm just more accustomed to Littleshade." Category:Blog posts